Countdown

We're leaving in one-month period.

Yeah, I AM leaving real soon. It's unbelievable that this is coming to an end.

Spending time with new friends for one whole year, until today, we are buddies in studies and daily life. 

There are a lot of uncertainties ahead, though I'm doing with more effort than usual to grab the given opportunity. 

To be frank, I wanna stay with these friends, or to put it in another word - comrades.

Well, perhaps the chances are small, I pray hard. I hope that I can see them in August.

I don't feel like meeting old schoolmates again...

Seeing them is not a big deal though. So I must go for it.

I'm handling with countless stuffs lately.

And what I dislike so much now is filling forms and documents.

You don't know how challenging it is to me. I have to swallow back my tears when I do that.

There are some spaces where I left them empty.

What to do. I know that I shouldn't have that kinda feelings but I can't help it.

And when I need to switch something important, I'm not only convincing people but also myself.

I must do well to make sure that I don't cause problem to other people.

However, all of these have been pressurizing me and this definitely negatively affects me.

Moreover, I can't figure out what's wrong with me nowadays. 

Zuer saw my previous blog post and sent me a message with so encouraging words.

It was so random. My teary eyes told me that I have back-up even if I'm a complete failure.

She is so lovely. I'm moved by her support.

But if looking into the reality, I can only move on and make it work. 

Carmen Thong, you cannot think of failure at all at this stage. You cannot fall. You must not fall.

I realize that even though I was a stressless girl, but family problems really gave a great impact on my life. God, you know these can challenge my stress-immuned system, that's why you wanna coarsen me with such difficulties? 

I sincerely wish you to bless me God.

You understand, you understand that I'm unable to afford this. 

So please, please. God bless me, my family and friends.